There are many crucial aspects of planning a wedding that require a lot of thought and decision. Choosing the right bridesmaids is exactly one of those important aspects. However, it is not as easy as it might first appear. This guide aims to help you in this decision-making process and details everything you need to consider to ensure that you have the right bridesmaids by your side on your special day.
Look at who you know
Before you start making any kind of decision, you need to evaluate the people in your life. A good place to start is by writing down a list of the people you have known the longest. This could be a life-long friend or a sibling; sisters are usually the first port of call for many brides-to-be. Once you have listed these people, start to look at those who have recently come into your life. While you haven’t known them as long, there might be some people that you have really made an impact on your life. It doesn’t matter if they are a good friend, work colleague, or family member; if they are special to you, you should put them on the list. A good tip for when you are writing this list is to think about who you want to be involved as much as possible on your special day.
Think about how many you want
The next step to take after making your list is to think about how many bridesmaids you actually want. While you don’t need to stick by a hard-fast rule here, having a set number will make it easier for further preparations in the wedding. For example, you might want to have an even number so that when it comes to pictures, you can stand in the middle with an equal number of bridesmaids either side of you. On the other hand, you might like the idea of a staggered photo where they are standing in a row behind you, and therefore, you can have an odd number. Whether you choose to have an odd or even number, picking this early on means you can begin the next stage of choosing your bridesmaids.
Take a moment to look at your list and count how many names you have written down. If it is more than 10 names, this is the perfect time to start cutting down that list. But how can you do this? There was, of course, a reason you put all those people on the list in the first place, so why should you just take them off without a second thought? However, realistically, you cannot have everyone. The best way to go about this is to consider the following points and analyse each of your bridesmaids so that you are confident they can play a significant part in your bride squad.
Are they responsible?
Being a bridesmaid will involve a lot more than just putting on a pretty dress on the wedding day. It will require them to take a lot of responsibility in the run-up to and on the day itself. You need them to be available for dress fittings and hair and beauty trials, months in advance, and if they are not responsible for their time management or forget about it, then what are they going to be like on your wedding day? You don’t want to be worrying about whether they have turned up on time, you should be enjoying your day. This is why you should consider those who are more responsible than others, especially when they will be in charge of your hen party!
Personality is a big thing when it comes to choosing your bridesmaids. Not only do you have to ensure that they will be able to cope with their part, but you want to ensure that they won’t steal your spotlight either. Therefore, somebody with a huge personality, while they might mean you no harm, might be better off with a much smaller part in the wedding because this way, they have less chance of taking over and becoming the centre of attention.
However, it might benefit you to have the best of both worlds. Have someone in your bride squad that is a little bit more confident so they can do the speeches and someone that is fun and ready to get the party started. It would benefit you as well to have a calming presence around you so that they can look after you in the lead up to the big day. They will be able to ensure you are in safe hands!
Don’t feel any pressure
Something that many brides will experience, unfortunately, is pressure from other people. Even if it is a family member who you have known your entire life, such as a cousin or sister, don’t feel obliged to choose them as a bridesmaid. You need to select people who you are closest to, and you can’t help it if it isn’t these people. Be sure to stand your ground and not cave in when people start to put pressure on you to choose them.
Similarly, you shouldn’t feel the need to ask people to be your bridesmaid just because you were theirs. They will understand how hard it is to choose bridesmaids and won’t take offence to you not picking them.
Will they all get on?
Finally, something that needs some serious thought is, will they all get on? Having a group of girls that possibly have never met each other could be cause for some drama if there are clashing personalities. Of course, choosing your bridesmaids is entirely up to you, and they will have to get on regardless, but if you’re worried, it might be best to look at the group as a whole and consider if they will all get on.
Choosing your bridesmaids can seem like a mammoth task, especially when you have so much to consider. Every bride will want different things from her bridesmaids, but by sticking to this guide, you should find it much easier to narrow down who will be by your side throughout the entire wedding process.